The Pictures Speak

evilfr0g: The first thing I do when I look at paintings is notice the color schemes and normally the ones you use are very soothing, almost repressed colors. Like they could be bold but the way they are put onto the pallet, it's almost like they are hiding. Then I look at the figures and in all of your paintings, the figure is almost always looking away. The face shows more expression than any other part of the body and the eyes show more of the soul, but in your paintings, you hide this from the viewer because they're always looking away, or to the side. The one exception being bart's first portrait. He's looking directly into the viewer
evilfr0g: saying "look at me, this is who I am! Love me". And if I remember correctly, this was about the time you and aly started getting affectionate.

But bart's next picture... much more subdued, same hiding colors. Last but not least, after looking at the figures, I look at what the figures are doing and all of them ALWAYS have something powerful with them but they are never doing anything with it. Aly has a fireball but it's not going anywhere, that one drg had a polearm and a wyvern but they were both downtrodden at his side. All this power, but for some reason or another, they never use it and when you match it up with the colors, you realize it's because they're hiding and because they are scared of what will happen if they do. They want to use it...a pent up fireball of explosive rage, yet it still stays quietly by their side and now you realize why I say that all this emotion gets put into your paintings and not enough into your life which can possibly make others see you as shy, timid, maybe even lacking emotion. But if they saw the same zest for life that you put into your paintings, I don't see how they couldn't be infatuated by you cause people love strong personalities.

evilfr0g: but what hurts more?
evilfr0g: dealing with someone who may eventually reject you
evilfr0g: or
evilfr0g: never letting people see who you are, and always keeping your emotions locked into a portrait?
evilfr0g: I think in some ways, you paint because you hurt
evilfr0g: and in other ways
evilfr0g: you paint because you love life
evilfr0g: stuff hurts you, stuff bothers you, so you paint your emotions into a portrait
evilfr0g: but
evilfr0g: if it hurt you that much, you would have ended it a while ago
evilfr0g: maybe kept it all inside so no one could see
evilfr0g: but instead, you choose to paint
evilfr0g: you love life enough to express yourself
evilfr0g: in the hopes that one day, someone will understand
evilfr0g: and not be afraid of the force of nature inside you
evilfr0g: you haven't given up on yourself, so you paint
evilfr0g: but you paint, because you hurt
evilfr0g: get it?

Of course I get it. Sometimes people speak the exact words that run through your head, and it's uncanny. I also never knew I gave this much away in what I painted. Quite an eye-opener. He's not the first to tell me I'm not open with people or come across as shy or emotionless, but he is the first to point all this out just from how I paint.